Monday, June 22, 2009

Grandparents as "relief pitchers...."

Posted by Terry McNichols

Once again, I would like to point you to an article on This article by Barbara Graham on the 7 Laws of Grandparenting is excellent and so very true to my own experiences! Check it out. Here's an example of one of the 7 rules:
Accept your role. If you’re the mother of the new father, you may not have the same access to your grandchild as the maternal grandmother, at least in the beginning. In most families, new mothers are the primary caretakers of babies and they tend to lean on their mothers for support. This is not a problem — unless you think it is. Your grandchild will love you too. Anyhow, all grandparents — whether on the maternal or paternal side — are at risk of being shut out if they fail to observe any of these commandments. Try to think of yourself as a relief pitcher in a baseball game: You're on the bench until your adult children call you up — and then you must do as they say if you want to stay in the game. (We've already covered this, but I think it's key.)
I love the idea of being the "relief pitcher in a baseball game!" I have chosen not to do too much regularly-scheduled "day care" for just this reason. I don't want to be the starting pitcher -- I've already put in my time in that regard. But I love being the back up, getting to spend fun times with my individual grandkids and being looked on as a "treat." Do read the rules and let us know if you agree or disagree.


Peggy Forster said...

Wow, her list is short and too the point. But they are true. I like her honesty.

Julie said...

My Mom was indeed a "relief pitcher" when our kids were small. I now have one in grad school, and the other at the UW - both kids are extremely close to their Gram - calls on the phone (several times a week) and visits... They absolutely adore her. I second the motion for "relief pitchers"!